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Dedicated to a most loving and compassionate bright light who had a huge heart. R.I.P HOWARD ANDERS until we meet again.
This past Thanksgiving we prepared the turkey, filled our table to the full replete with sumptuous delicacies, and spent time in the company of loved ones in grateful thanks to God for all that we have been blessed with. What is not to love about that?
During the lead up to Thanksgiving there was a contagious spirit of joy and anticipation until suddenly we received devastating news of a dear friend interstate who was rushed to hospital in an acute medical state. He never came out of the induced coma and died 3 days later, once life support was switched off. None of us expected this. We were both eagerly anticipating good news that he would wake up. It was just not meant to be.
It was a most difficult few days after learning of Howard’s unexpected death so much so that I could not go to work. He was like a mischievous older brother with a cheeky but keen sense of humour. Howard had that unique quality of believing the best and seeing the best in others. God does that too. I truly am thankful for that. Thinking about our friend, I can honestly say that I do not ever remember a time when Howard complained about his situation in life. He had physical limitations with walking and needed Feast accommodation to assist with space and movement. We talked about these sorts of topics as he would occasionally seek out my advice as a registered nurse, not only for himself but for others whom he cared for. He was humble and always especially thankful for how God rescued him physically and spiritually.
About the same time the previous year, once all had returned from attending the Feast of Tabernacles, we no sooner had settled back into our routines when another spiritual family member died rather suddenly. It seems like too many have literally been here one day and gone the next. Yes, we are all ageing and death is inevitable. It is the suddenness of particular circumstances that can leave us in great shock, unprepared for this empty feeling that is unwelcome. Enter grief and sadness through the floodgates of immediate mourning.
We were not sure whether we would go ahead with our plans to celebrate Thanksgiving this year given the hole in our hearts. You see, Howard was one individual who wholeheartedly embraced my husband unconditionally in amongst a sea of “doubting Thomases”. It was simply good enough for Howard to know that God had brought us together even though it was sudden. Howard knew God could do anything and nothing was impossible with God (Job 42:2; Jeremiah 32:17; Matthew 19:26; Mark 10:27; Luke 1:37, 18:27). He had great discernment and a talent for testing the spirits. Howard would join in with a laugh or two, a joke, or some light hearted banter on Facebook; it was always respectful and appropriate. He was a true gentleman who knew how to laugh at himself, not taking himself too seriously. Howard was consistently full of positive comments about how grateful he was for our friendship. He truly was a staunch supporter and most loyal friend. Such a big hearted man full of outgoing agape love for the brethren. We will miss him so much.
We enjoyed having dinner with him in Melbourne when we visited brethren in Victoria early the previous year. That is definitely one highlight for us to cherish when we remember these fond memories. We tried to get together again at a nearby restaurant one evening when we were passing through his area only one month before his death, but unfortunately the timing was not convenient. The three of us shared a love of Indian food. Howard would often mention he made a “mean curry” and tried to entice us over to enjoy some of his hearty fare. I was going to surprise Howard with a silly souvenir badge from Hahndorf depicting a man wearing the German national costume replete with lederhosen, holding a beer stein in one hand, and a stick of sausage in the other. It was our joke because Howard kept saying he wanted to visit South Australia again. He remembered a previous trip quite some time ago when he had visited Hahndorf in the Adelaide hills and recounted a most enjoyable time. Instead Jim will now wear this as a badge of honour on his hat in remembrance of our jovial Howard.
The Sabbath before he died we had an especially lovely opportunity to speak at length over the phone before he went off to services. He confided in me regarding several things that were going on in his life, as true friends often do. He did not speak of anything concerning his health this time as I believe he felt well and things were stable. Howard joked once with me about being a “real” nurse because I liked the smell of boiling water. I thought that was funny at the time because I had not ever associated or linked the two together. Unbeknownst to me this was to be our last chat on the phone before he died. Howard was fully invested in caring for his adopted daughter. He was skilled at being a great parent to her; always patient and considerate with fatherly love in guidance and with the best of intentions. He was happy. I was happy for him. We both were.
Those Left Behind Need To Make Each And Every Day Count In Thankfulness
My prayers for Howard were for God’s will, of course. My will was to have him live longer as we still wanted to get together here in Adelaide and also in his hometown. We were looking forward to several “catch ups”. I asked God to consider giving Howard 15 more years like He did for King Hezekiah so he could get his house in order (Isaiah 38:5). Not meant to be. Howard didn’t need it and God took him now because his race has been run (2 Timothy 4:7-8) and he was ready to sleep until his resurrection (1 Thessalonians 4:13-18).
Instead of feeling upset or sad, and we may cry tears, but ultimately we do rejoice that Howard has run his race. We did celebrate Thanksgiving as we knew Howard would have wanted us to enjoy this time and give thanks to God for our blessings. Our thoughts were about Howard and all the fun times we had together, whether in person, on the phone, or in cyber land, and the realisation that we are indeed very blessed to be alive and still in service to God. Therefore all the more reason to redeem the time and make each day count (Ephesians 5:15-21). All those who go before us have been tried and tested and will await the time of their resurrection. In this we can give great thanks in meaningful gratitude to our most merciful Father who is preparing a place for us in His Kingdom (John 14:3). Imagine the full rejoicing we will all share in at the reunion of all reunions, the Wedding Supper of the Lamb, when our race will have also been run and we are all changed in the twinkling of an eye (1 Corinthians 15:51-52). Godspeed that day.
If Howard could leave us with a message it would reflect how he lived his life. Live and love one another in peace and harmony without factions or disputes, carefully esteeming others better than ourselves in order to prevent offences (Philippians 2:3). Always giving thanks for the most wonderful relationships that God has given to us with one another, for this life is but a vapour (James 4:14; Job 7:7) and short (Ecclesiastes 5:18-20). Forgive all, show mercy to all, and above all do all things without causing division, because this is love. What we see with our eyes does not always match up neatly with the intention of our hearts. It may look one particular way but the reality is it may be something far from our thoughts (Jeremiah 17:9). God knows exactly why we do what we do, and we would do well to please our Father by leading a life in humble praise and thanks to God (1 Thessalonians 5:18). Work on restoring your relationships if indeed they need restoration. Get to know your brethren as there are those who are lonely and need friendship. Love one another by spending time together. And one last thing...run your race ensuring you finish so that we can all rejoice together at that Wedding Supper, because it will all be so very worth it (Hebrews 12:1-3; Isaiah 40:31; and 1 Corinthians 9:24).